E-Comic: Requiem with a Birthday Cake

I just finished posting my Five Nights at Freddy's comic, and now that it's all done I thought it'd be handy to have it all in one place.  So I made an E-book out of it.  You can read it here, or save it to your computer or other device to read offline if you so desire.  You're welcome to save it wherever you like for your own personal use, but not to publicly post or re-archive this elsewhere.

When I posted the first page I said:

For a long time I've suffered from artist's paralysis.  I'll try to draw something, but as soon as my pencil approaches a clean sheet of paper a shrill voice in my head tells me not to bother, I'll never get it right, I'll only waste my time, it'll be embarrassing to look at later, and so on.  All too often that voice wins, and I give up after spoiling the paper with a few halfhearted lines.

I decided to try to combat this by doing a comic.  I used to draw comics all the time.  In high school and college I did over 70 issues of Bangkok Alley, a comic about alley cats!  But these days the thought of trying to do sequential art intimidates me.  I try too hard to make it perfect, freeze up, and fail to get past the pencil stage.  This time I've decided to keep it loose, working with tools that feel comfortable in my hands: sharpies.  I'm going to do it quickly, using my comfortable, scratchy, crosshatchy style, and not worry about getting everything looking just so.  I'll just flat in the colors without breaking my heart on shading.  This ain't gonna be any great shakes, artistically speaking.  I'm here to tell a story, and if that comes across, then I'll be happy.

I've enabled critiques on this piece, so please feel free to leave comments and constructive criticism on the overall comic.

By the way, I've already seen a few bits of fan art based on this comic.  In the description the artists express hope that I won't be annoyed.  Far from it, I take that as a high compliment!  Knock yourselves out.  If you create anything based on this, please note me or link to the original comic so I'll be sure to see your work.